KNOBS AND SCOOPS

I live on the corner of a big yet-to-be-developed field.

Recently, in a "hits close to home" proof that the economy is recovering, developers have started to cause earthquakes all day long.

They started with one yellow caterpillar machine that has a giant roller on the front with knobs, flattening the ground. That machine, we'll call "knobs". This machine is the closest one in the photo.

Then, about two days ago, they added a big Caterpillar with a giant scoop, that started messing with the giant mounds of dirt. Moving the dirt to places to flatten those places out, AND to eliminate the big mounds of dirt. We'll call this one "Scoops". Scoops is in the far side of the photo

There's also Knobs II, and Scoops II, but i think you can guess what they do.

So last week, Knobs was driving around and around flattening things out. Every 6 or 7 minutes, he'd come close to my end of the giant field, and i would imagine a big German Panzer tank approaching, because the thing hasn't been oiled or greased in years and it literally sounds like tanks sound in those WWII movies.

Earlier this week, I was sitting on my couch having lunch watching noon time news, when all of a sudden I honestly thought there was an earth. That was when Scoops showed up and started doing his thing. My entire couch was shaking, which means my floor is shaking too. Even Karma lifted his head and wondered what the hell was going on. I even walked outside to see what the ruckus was and realized it was Scoops.

My home office window is the one i took that photo out of. There's no escaping Scoops and Knobs from that room, because the sound is never ending, and just gets to you. You can drown it out for a while, but as soon as you hear it, it won't let up.

So i moved my home office to the other side of my little home, my bedroom. Not the end of the world to work from my bed with my laptop on my lap, my notepad on one side, note on the other and my headset on, since i don't hold it anyway. But it gets tiring to be in here all day then sleep here too.

Now that scoops and knobs have 2 siblings join them, the noise is pretty ridiculous. Scoops and his brother are so loud, that he drowns out most of Knobs' lack of Grease sounds. However, because there are 4 of them now, every few seconds one of them is backing up, meaning you get that wonderful PEEP PEEP PEEP PEEP PEEP PEEP backing up sound.

But that's not the worst part. Today, they have moved to Phase II, which involves doing stuff that creates FULL TIME earthquakes in my house. At first I thought I was hallucinating, or that my dog was sleeping up against the bed and was dreaming that he was running, or maybe Pippin the cat was on the bed scratching himself(which shakes the bed), but no... it's friggin' Knobs and Scoops brothers, because a small framed painting I have on my wall reflects outside light on it, and i can see it trembling ALL. DAY. LOOOONG.

It's officially 5:02pm on Friday, and they're still going. Don't they have beer to go drink?? (Maybe i'll buy them some to get them to stop at 3 everyday.)

I can't even sneak over the fence at night and slash their tires.

: (

KILL ME NOW